Thursday, October 2, 2008

Mind over Matter?

A colleague of mine did something today that has me thinking about it still. Finding an apology mail, suddenly out of the blue would do this to most of us; it says, its for all those times when she hurt me. More than surprised, for she thinks she hurt me, I am trying to understand even if she did, why did she?

I hope everything is alright there and whatever is going on in her mind, gets off her mind soon as I never felt hurt or anything. I tried conveying that to her & in reply she says, my alternate career could be writing as I love doing that. So she has plainly refused to believe me.

Reason for such reaction from me could be due to my being less observant and attentive than few others round, about certain things. But the fact is- most of the times, its immaterial for me.

Some say its my 'no care' attitude. Could it be that? perhaps yes! Should I care about people who want to hurt me? I am only giving an example.. but when I am engaged in my own world, I am a happier person so why would I get entangled into these issues n get hurt?

Some also say that I have a terribly big eye for detail. I myself am a victim to that. My workplace believes in playing with ones strengths rather than weaknesses. But they also convinced me that your strengths could be your biggest weaknesses if not worked upon carefully. That’s some gyan from 'gallups strengths finder' but yes I do have not one but two big eyes for detail. Ask Amit.

He says my problem is that I take everything literally whereas his statements are most of the time symbolic. Now I don’t remember what was the exact issue that triggered this realisation between the two of us but how could I be so dumb to do so? of not understanding what he really means.. Here again! I feel like telling myself- Does that really matter? I am the way I am.

With a mind full of all such clutter, here ends the day and time for me to try some good night sleep.

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