How much will you buy ur groom for???

Y would a physically healthy, educated, earning/working, grownup young guy need money? I am not sure of his mental health and maturity though? I ask this to myself. 

"Well, there could be many reasons" says me to myself. "He may want to buy a land or a house for use or investment, study further, trave abroad, just splurge doing some fun things, buy some fancy gadgets for his home, contribute in his siblings wedding, gift his parents some material stuff or just put in his bank for assurance and liquidity."

Fine.. possible.. sounds good & its all ok.

But the annoyance comes into existance when you learn that he wants this money from the girl he would marry or from her parents.

yes, he needs D O W R Y.. In the form of cash or car or house or one side funding the whole wedding or a lavish honeymoon or all of these or whatever????

I dint encounter such a family during my own groom hunt search. Must consider myself lucky. 

BUT HOW??? how on earth, in todays age, can somebody even open their mouth to seek dowry, I fail to understand??? WHY is it that a girl equally capable (if he cant accept her to be better or more) does not make it all for a wedding alliance???

I have heard of girls bringing car or at times house, appliances or furnishings as wedding gift accepted from her parents. I know every parent wants to shower their daughter with everything possible for them and girl has full right to bring it along if she so wishes and if the grooms side has no issues in accepting them. Can this be termed as dowry? I dont think so, dowry is what the guy or his parents demand and I am wondering how can they make this demand... &%#$!! sorry, I had resolved not to use bad words this year!

I usually dont get into such hurting, argumentative subjects; not because I am fine with them but because i feel so incapable of changing and dealing with them on a larger scale. However, I decide to live the change; as they say- it starts from within.

All my respect goes to those parents of girls and in many cases of guys also, who oppose this sick-cheap custom or tradition. Like all other customs, dowry must also have started with some logic or reason that doesnt exist anymore but some shameless families are still safegauring this and not hesitating even if this means 'selling their son'. 

When will we change for good and move ahead??? Pains to see my country still trapped in such issues?

One of my friends came across this handsome guy whose family had a big enough mouth. With her consent I reproduce bits of what some of them said or felt. Its pains to read thru, each statement for a different reason.

guy's DAD - "I have given huge dowries for 3 of my daughters - so now I want it too."

guy - "nothing like that was mentioned on the matrimonial profile so we thought you would be open to it” 

girl - "Perhaps they didnt like me & hence asked for so much"

I am happy my friend's parents were against dowry seekers(inspite of having 2 sons u see) but who is the sufferer here? The girl ofcourse, as she makes this wrong and negative assumption about her own self..

I only told her not to think like that as I think the loss is all on other side. 

Is dowry not illegal? Something must be done to stop it, to wipe it off the society... I really feel so incapable of doing anything here but I am so upset with it :O Sorry for this cheap subject line but I am really appalled right now.

Someone out there thinks guys can be put up on sale, sons can be auctioned for a car or something. Doesnt that sound disgusting.. Its more heinous than that.

Cool Dubai and some cold..

So I finally get a Hindustan Lever Stamp (read it as leaver my dear). Thats what i was told when i was at the airport.

Yesss! I am in dubai, the land of sun and sand as some call it.

& it snowed in some parts here, the day I landed. What a cool welcome..

Let me start with my worry of packing my stuff(literally spread all over the house in mumbai) into the 20 kg baggage as i mentioned earlier. I didnt want to bring anything extra because past experience tells me that 70% of my clothes dont see the light outside my suitcase/cupboard. Sweetly enough, Mom helped by arranging for a spring balance. I removed my warm clothes, heavy punjabi suits, few more sarees and some old casuals etc and managed to come with only 5 kgs extra.

Isn't that good management? Now other side of story is that I had stuffed my laptop bag, cabin bag and purse/handbag as much as possible as they are not weighed. But my heart weakened at the mumbai immigration counter to read on a board that only 2 bags are allowed (including laptop/cabin/hand bag) so quickly filling the immigration form, I arranged max of my purse's contents into the cabin bag but where would i put the purse itself? it wasnt small enough to be put inside any other bag so i might have to leave it at the airport. Being my first international flight I was little apprehensive. I had also heard that rules are strictly followed in international airports. But I was nowhere questioned abt anything. & I landed with all my luggage intact.

I must mention this as well. Husband had expressed his devout side to my mum and asked for Tulsi plant to be sent along with me. Now would I be able to carry it? The driver suggested that I tell the authorities (incase they question) that its a medicinal herb that I am carrying. But I tell you, its a problem only when u ask someone whether you can carry or not. I packed it in a long tube like container and kept inside the check-in bag and forgot abt it. 

That too reached here safely.

On the flight, I got a window seat and kept looking down, clicking pics from there too. The view of ships in the sea through the clouds from top was captivating and strengthened the place of 'a vacation on cruise' in my wish list. & then an idea of a desert safari as soon as we crossed the Arabian sea and came over the endless deserts. 

Enjoying the beauty infrastructure of roads and buidlings we landed at 4pm. Didnt spend much time @ the airport but that was beautiful too. I found the eye test sheer waste of time though. The flight took me 2 & a half hours and the formalities at the airport took another 2 hours. The heavy laptop bag and cabin bag were being carried on all these 2 hours. So, by the time I came out and looked for Amit, I was totally tired but still was all smiling at the sight of him.

Yesss.. I have finally reached here all well :) I hope this move across the geography prove good for us in all ways.

The warm welcome by the darling husband was lovely. He afterall had been waiting to get his laundry and other things taken care of :p and now that my visa says "Housewife" as occupation, he doesnt leave a single chance to giggle over it and tease me.

We had an amazing first weekend roaming around some malls and Jumeira beach by the sun set. & Some friends from this land have just given baby news so there are plans to meet them soon.

Its gonna be fun setting up everything all over again but the cold waves have hit me hard and I have been shivering and feeling feverish for the whole of today :( 

I resolve - 2009

An incidence yday made me think that I have been using bad words pretty often and with just too much of ease, fun thing being the pleasure I get in using them! chi chi.. They sound sweet (I am yet to graduate to those higher levels that sound gross!) but i dont want to be using them anymore. 

A year an a half of Delhi stay and especially city driving along with my better 2/3rd (:P .. this doesnt count in being bad) is to be blamed for it in my case. However, in 2009, I will conciously make an effort to minimise the use and be polite.

I read somewhere that writing down your resolution strengthens the determination to follow it through. Wats the harm anyways, in trying this trick as well. 

Mumbai's Lifeline

Being knocked on your back to be informed that there is a queue. that also at the peak rush hour at a crowded station like Thane... those of you who have travelled in mumbai locals for work, would know the shock n surprise i am talking abt.

It was a ladies first class coach of the 9.14 thane local fast train from platform no. 7 today morning. I was late for office but then it was worth. and yes, everyone stood in a queue.. train came and nobody jumped into the bogie to grab the window seat. 

I was pleasantly surprised to see the small change brought about by the regular office goers to make their own life easier..